


Goodbye Storybrooke

by faithinthepoor



Series: Once Upon a Time [46]
Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-04
Updated: 2015-03-04
Packaged: 2018-03-16 07:35:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,332
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3479744
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/faithinthepoor/pseuds/faithinthepoor
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Set during Going Home</p>
            </blockquote>





	Goodbye Storybrooke

**Author's Note:**

> In my series this follows my [Fairytale Drabbles](http://archiveofourown.org/works/618763), [Mirror Mirror](http://archiveofourown.org/works/618771), [This Provincial Life](http://archiveofourown.org/works/618775), [Viviane or Nimue](http://archiveofourown.org/works/618809), [Dreams and Wishes](http://archiveofourown.org/works/618851), [All the Better To….](http://archiveofourown.org/works/619484), [Magic Keys](http://archiveofourown.org/works/619497), [Curiouser and Curiouser](http://archiveofourown.org/works/619514), [Snow Blind](http://archiveofourown.org/works/620280), [Spinning Straw](http://archiveofourown.org/works/620288), [Wooden Hearts](http://archiveofourown.org/works/621128), [Poisoned](http://archiveofourown.org/works/622526), [True Love and Other Curses](http://archiveofourown.org/works/625038), [Spellbound](http://archiveofourown.org/works/628806), [Over the Rainbow](http://archiveofourown.org/works/630076), [Facades](http://archiveofourown.org/works/632227), [Lost Girls](http://archiveofourown.org/works/636939), [Monstrosities](http://archiveofourown.org/works/640162), [Love and Lies](http://archiveofourown.org/works/652912), [Something Wicked this Way Comes](http://archiveofourown.org/works/665458), [Dreamscapes](http://archiveofourown.org/works/672345), [Homecomings](http://archiveofourown.org/works/676052), [Test Match](http://archiveofourown.org/works/682287), [Wishful Thinking](http://archiveofourown.org/works/697330), [Absent Friends](http://archiveofourown.org/works/771482), [Small Mercies](http://archiveofourown.org/works/773663), [State of Mind](http://archiveofourown.org/works/778498), [Good Intentions](http://archiveofourown.org/works/802589), [The Sins of Mothers](http://archiveofourown.org/works/820893), [Affairs of the Heart](http://archiveofourown.org/works/855926), [Power Plays](http://archiveofourown.org/works/942825), [Future Plans](http://archiveofourown.org/works/969035), [Crying Wolf](http://archiveofourown.org/works/982369), [The Eye of the Storm](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1004056), [Doomsday Devices](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1155836), [Villains](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1191873), [Attachments](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1223896), [Pain and Pixie Dust](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1284520), [Absences](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1387075), [Fighting Fires](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1951305), [Poor Unfortunate Souls](http://archiveofourown.org/works/2274636), [Balancing Acts](http://archiveofourown.org/works/2399231), [Dogs and Their Bones](http://archiveofourown.org/works/2489315), [Not Today](http://archiveofourown.org/works/3152894) and [Home Again](http://archiveofourown.org/works/3405752)

Back in another time, in another life, she cast a curse to destroy happy endings. She had been certain that it was what she wanted, certain that it was the right choice. The price of that curse had been steep but she had been willing to pay it and she believed that it had been paid in full; that the blood of Rocinate and the blood of her father had secured her a future in a world where she had a chance to be happy. 

Storybrooke taught her that happiness is a relative term. Victory can only ever be so sweet if no one actually knows that you have won. Hollow victories amount to hollow lives and she was more empty here than she had ever been in the Enchanted Forest. At least there she had rage to fuel her. In this world her rage was pointless. It's hard to find satisfaction in being angry at people who don't really exist anymore, no matter how much you hate them. 

She had come to accept that her plan had been flawed. The act of casting the curse was not enough to create a happy ending and she was going to have to do that on her own. The problem was that she didn't know where to start. She could find fleeting movements of joy in torturing the new, insipid, short-haired version of Snow but the point of torture is not just the pain inflicted, it's the pain carried, the pain remembered, and in the world of Storybrooke she was the only one cursed with the pain of memory. Graham provided a distraction of sorts but he was a ghost of man, and she had died long ago at the hands of her mother's ambition, and it turns out that two dead people cannot bring one another to life. 

Regina was as doomed as everyone else in the town. This place was her tomb and in a world without magic there was no escape from her walking grave. There are others ways to end things, death can come by hand just as quickly as it can by a fireball, but she did not wish to die. To die would be to admit defeat and to admit defeat would mean that she had given up her quest to bring back Daniel. She could never do that. She would languish forever in this realm before she would betray him in that way. 

This may not have been the happy ending she had in mind but it was a place where she could love Daniel for all eternity. He was fitting of such a tribute and she had resigned herself to the fact that honouring his memory was all that was ahead of her, all that her life could ever be, and then came Owen. 

The boy changed everything, the boy made her feel, and even though she failed to keep him she knew that she couldn't go back to the way things were before he stumbled into town. Owen gave her the path that led her to Henry, and for that she will always be grateful, but that doesn't mean she mourns his passing. The only thing she mourns about his death is that it was not at her hands. Owen endangered Henry and she wishes she could rip him limb from limb as punishment for that crime. The dark part of her yearns to destroy him; slowly, painfully and repeatedly. 

To say that one's child is one's whole world is not an uncommon thing but for Regina this was not a saying, it was a statement of fact. Henry breathed life back into her. He was the sun and the moon, the night and the day, the focal point around which she orbited. Henry made this world real. Henry made her real. 

She thought that in him she had found her happy ending and for a while that was true. When he was small he looked at her like she held the answers to everything. Her appearance in a room was an event for him. Regina is not sure exactly when she went from being the one who soothed his fears to the one who caused them but she knows that it nearly destroyed her. She who had revealed in her cruelty and rejoiced in the terror she evoked was brought to her knees when she realised that her child was afraid of her. 

Regaining his love and trust became her new mission and even though she worried that, without magic, she would never be able to bend him to her will she was not deterred. Impossible quests do not daunt her, if anything they define her, but it seems this quest was not impossible. Henry loves her now, perhaps not in the way that he once did, but he loves her nonetheless. His love for her is both more and less than it used to be and if she has to lose him forever at least she can take comfort in knowing that he has seen who she really is and loves her anyway. 

Giving him up to save him was not a difficult decision, even if she hasn't been the best at showing it, he has always come first. Deciding to let him go with his other mother was a lot harder but Emma is the only one who can keep Henry safe and in the end that is the only thing that matters. She would like to pretend that her reluctance to let Henry go with Emma is solely based on not wanting to lose Emma as well as Henry but, as selfish as that would be, it's not the only issue. Emma is the right choice and the only person she would want to raise Henry in her absence but the thought of Emma having Henry's future fills her with jealous ire. The part of her that once wanted to fight tooth and nail to keep Emma from Henry has awoken from it's slumber and it whispers angrily to her that this is all Emma ever wanted, that the saviour came to this town to steal her son and has finally succeeded. 

Her insecurities bubble within and threaten to spill to surface. They threaten her belief that Emma ever cared for her and they threaten to force her to accuse Emma of having lied all along. That scenario seems all too plausible in her head because in her drive to return her lost love she made herself unlovable, however when she looks at Emma she can't make herself believe that has been anything other than real. Maybe she's just lying to herself or maybe it doesn’t really matter if Emma ever loved her so long as she was able to make Regina believe that she was loved. Perhaps being loved doesn't matter at all. It's a sobering realisation for someone raised in a world that revered the power of true love but it's easier to accept when life has taught you that true love is not yours for the taking. It has never been an option for her - not with Daniel and not with Emma. Kissing Daniel didn't bring him back from the dead and kissing Emma didn't break the last curse and it can't stop this one. 

The curse is coming and Henry and Emma are leaving. There will be time to examination motives later, she will have a lifetime to do that, but right now she needs to make the most of the remaining movements she has with her two loves. This is how she finds herself in the backseat of Emma's death trap on wheels driving towards the town line. She is heading in the direction of pain that she could be running from but she will steal whatever seconds of their time that she can before Henry and Emma are gone forever. 

This is not the position she should have in this car, she should not deign to be in this car at all, but she wasn't technically invited on this trip, not publically at least. If others had have had their way there would be no space for her in the beetle. Snow had made it abundantly clear that this moment was about family and was equally clear who that family consisted of, naturally Regina had failed to make the cut. If Snow’s wishes had been filled the car would have been packed with Charmings and Rumpelstiltskin's spawn would have taken the last remaining seat. 

Sometimes she feels like Emma is afterthought to these people and if Emma is an afterthought it would seem that Henry is no thought at all. Apparently it is inconceivable that he might need to spend some time with the woman who raised him. Like the heroes that they are the Charmings put their need to be with the child they never knew above Henry getting a chance to say goodbye to someone who was a large part of his life. 

Emma might be a Charming by birth but she is nothing like her parents. She had looked at Regina with panicked eyes as Snow had expoused the merits her plan and eventually put an end to it by insisting that she and Henry should travel alone. Regina is not going to pretend that seeing the hurt Emma’s decision produced written clearly Snow’s face didn’t please her but that was a very small light in the darkness of the grief she's facing. 

When Emma’s vile, yellow car disappeared from view she wanted to collapse to the ground, her legs didn’t want to support her weight, but she will never give these people the satisfaction of seeing her broken like that. She buries her scars, it’s what she has always done, what her mother taught her to do. What her mother taught her to be. 

Thankfully the rest of the group adhered to Emma’s wishes and did not drive off after them. Emma had requested a head start. She told them that she needed some space to come to terms with what was about to happen, and to talk with Henry, and as the others fixed their eyes on the last point where Emma had been seen, Regina had slipped away. 

When she was certain she was out of view she turned her thoughts to the only two things that matter in her world and hoped she had not misunderstood Emma’s intentions. She filled her mind with images of Henry and Emma, pictured herself with them, and let her magic do the rest. Regina was pleased to note that when she opened her eyes she was standing next to a stationary car. 

She climbed into the back of the vehicle and without a word Emma recommenced her journey. Now they travel onwards toward their fate and she feels doubt gnawing at her, telling her that this was the wrong thing to do – that it’s too late, that Emma and Henry are already gone. 

It’s Henry who breaks the silence that hangs heavily in the air, “So did the two of you plan this?” 

“I knew this was the only option,” she admits, “from the moment I touched the scroll I knew I had to give up the thing I love the most. I just didn’t want it to be true.” 

Henry is quiet for a while and she thinks he is mulling things over but it appears the issue is that he's dissatisfied with her answer because when he does speak his voice is tinged with anger. “But why did you stop the car Mom?" he asks Emma. "Were you waiting for her?” 

Bile rises in her throat at being referred to as ‘her’ and she has to bite her tongue and wait for Emma’s answer. 

“Yes,” is all that Emma provides. 

“Why?” Henry demands. 

“Because she should be here. She’s your mother too.” Emma’s response has gone a long way towards easing her pain and she very much wants to kiss the blonde right now. 

“How did you know that she would come though?” 

“I didn’t,” Emma confesses. “I guess I just hoped that she'd know that you and I needed her here.” 

“Why didn’t you just say so before we left? Why all the secrecy?” 

“Are you upset that we had a sneaky operation without you?” Emma jokes. 

Henry shakes his head from side to side, “No,” he says but Regina suspects he means yes, “I just don’t understand why it had to be this way.” 

She sighs and runs a hand through her hair, “You might have noticed that no one else felt that it was important for me to be in the car.” 

“But no one asked me,” Henry says petulantly and for a moment her heart feels so light that she might just float away. 

“I know they didn’t sweetheart. Don’t be too hard on them,” she cannot believe the things that are coming out of her mouth, “they were just thinking about how they didn’t want to lose time with you and Emma.” 

“You could have just said that you wanted to come.” 

“Yes she could have,” Emma informs him, “but I though this way would be easier for everyone. This way there wasn't a fight over who should be in the car with us.” 

“But Mom didn’t even say that she wanted to be with us,” he grumbles and suddenly she understands. He thinks she doesn’t want him, that she’s already given him away. 

“That doesn’t mean I didn’t want to be with you. I’m here now, aren’t I? Henry you are the most important thing in the world to me and I love you with all my heart. I didn’t say anything because I didn’t want a fight either.” In retrospect it was the wrong decision. She shouldn’t have been worried about fighting with them. She should have been focused on fighting for Henry. 

“There wouldn’t have really been a fight,” he says by way of rejecting her reasoning. 

“Maybe not with weapons Henry but they would have fought with words,” and blood would have been drawn just the same. 

“You would have won either way,” his says the words in anger but she feels a sense of pride that he believes she would have been victorious. 

“It’s not a fight anyone could have won Henry. Everybody loses today. Sitting in this car doesn’t change that. You, me, Emma, your grandparents, we are all losing people we love today.” 

“So maybe we could have found a way to all be together for this trip,” his says earnestly. 

“I appreciate and understand their loss, Henry, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that I want their company.” 

Before Henry can respond Emma chimes in with, “Or that any of you would have been capable of being civil during the trip.” 

“My understanding and tolerance have their limits,” she replies and fails to keep the smirk on her face out of her voice. 

“I think you could have done it,” Henry says with faith in her that she doesn't deserve. 

“Henry, I didn't even make the short list of those they thought should be in the car. I wasn't even a consideration. I don't trust that I could have just ignored the fact that they made it clear that Neal was more important than I am.” 

“Maybe he should be here,” it seems Henry is shining blind faith all over the place today. 

“Henry he might be you father but he is not your parent. Not like I am.” 

“You used to feel that way about Emma,” he points out. 

He is not wrong and in a way she still believes that. These interlopers who came to claim her son could never lay claim to his childhood. That was hers alone. She was the one who raised him but thanks to Pan all that is about to change. “Emma is different. Your other mother is like a fungus, she has managed to grow on me.” 

“So you really are okay with me going with her?” 

“No! I'm not okay with you going at all but if I have no other choice I'm glad Emma will be with you. I would never want you to be alone.” He seems somewhat appeased by her response and she should just leave it at that but there are things that she cannot let go unsaid. “Henry, there’s something I need to tell you.” 

“Yeah, yeah, you’ve already told me. You both love me and I’m important, I know,” her child sasses her and if it wasn’t going to be the last time she will ever see him she would have scolded and grounded him until he was once again complaining that she was an evil queen. 

“You are important and we do both love you but that’s not actually what I wanted to say.” 

“Oh,” Henry’s voice is small and a painful reminder of just how little he really is. 

“Henry….we…I…..I love you very much,” she is fumbling for words and she’s not sure she can do this so she leans forward and places her hand over the one Emma has on the gearshift, “and I love Emma.” 

Emma’s eyes seek hers out in the rear view mirror and she looks at Regina like she cannot quite believe what is happening. Regina nods at her and a smile erupts on Emma’s face as she says, “And I love your mom.” 

“You guys don’t need to do this,” she is drowning in the wave of panic that his words produce, “I know you are just trying to get me to believe that you’re fine that Emma and I are leaving but you don’t need to lie to me.” 

Of all the ways she though Henry might have reacted to finding out that she loves Emma, him believing she was lying for his sake was not on the list. “It’s true that I’m telling you this because you are leaving with Emma, but Henry, it’s not a lie. I love Emma.” She laces her fingers with Emma’s and braces for Henry’s response. 

“You can’t,” he says coolly. 

“She can and she does,” Emma says gently. 

“No! You can’t!” Henry cries. 

“Henry, I want you to try and understand,” but the thing is that she’s not actually sure what she wants him to understand. If he knows the truth about them then he also knows that this happened behind his back, that they kept it from him, and that is not the parting gift she wants to give to her son. 

“There’s nothing to understand. You’re,” he points a finger at Emma, “the saviour and you’re,” he jabs the finger in Regina’s direction, “the evil queen, you cannot be in love.” 

“And yet we are,” Emma tells him. 

Henry turns in his seat to face the road. He is deathly still and eerily quiet. 

“Honey…” 

“Don’t,” he interrupts her with the wave of a hand, “nobody talks. I don’t want to hear anything.” 

Her eyes meet Emma’s in the mirror and she sees Emma mouth ‘It will be okay,' but that doesn’t seem possible. 

She releases Emma’s hand and tries to disappear into the seat because she doesn’t want to do anything to further antagonise her son. If Henry appreciates her actions he gives no indication and they continue the rest of the trip in a state of tacit and uncomfortable suspended animation. 

Emma brings the car to a halt inches from the town line and Henry is out the door almost before the wheels stop spinning. He runs headlong for the line and she is convinced he will bolt straight past it but he stops himself dead, right on top of the demarcation. She exits the car and cautiously makes her way around to the front of the yellow monstrosity. He looks to her and it is as though the town line symbolises a turning point for him. Her responses will apparently dictate what he will do next. 

“How long?” he demands to know. 

“A while,” she reluctantly admits. 

“Not long enough,” Emma says as she comes to stand beside her and grasps her hand. 

“How can you say that?” Henry looks distraught. 

“Because Pan cast some stupid curse that means we are never go to see her again and I don’t know about you Henry but I find that unbelievably unfair.” 

“That's because you'd rather be with her then with me,” he accuses and there is such anguish in his voice. 

“It's not like that, Henry,” Emma says. “I’m not going to say that I wouldn't rather be with both of you or that I'm not mad that I won't get a chance to know my parents better….” 

“See!” Henry interrupts, “No one wants me!” 

Regina is devastated for her son. She kneels down beside him and regrets that decision immediately. The action no longer brings her to his eye level. Her child has grown. He towers above her in this position but maybe that's for the best. Maybe that's what Henry needs right now, to feel that he has some power. Some control. She risks placing her arms around him and him squirms in her embrace but does not go so far as to completely shake her off. “It's not like that. We are not happy with the situation but you are not a consolation prize. Henry, you are everything.” 

He sniffles and wipes at his nose with the back of his hand. He seems like such a little boy in that moment and she aches at the thought of losing her baby. "Are you sending me with Emma because you're not sure who to send?" 

"I may have expressed my concerns about Emma's parenting skills," vocally and often, "but there is no one else I would trust with your wellbeing. If it can't be me it should be Emma." 

"But," Henry whispers, "you need to send away the thing you love most. Are you sure that Emma's not the one that you have to send away?" 

"Oh Henry," she hugs him tightly, "of course I'm sure. I really do love Emma but you’re my son. I will never love anyone more than you." 

"The same goes for me kid." Emma squats down next to them and places one hand on Regina's shoulder and the other on Henry's cheek. 

He briefly seems to take that at face value but then he tilts his head to the side and asks, "But what if you have other kids?" 

She goes to answer but then realises it's irrelevant. Henry will never know if there is another child in her life. The same is not true for Emma though, and she watches on as the blonde laughs and ruffles his hair before telling him, "Well, if that ever happens you will have to learn to deal with sibling rivalry like another other big brother." The idea of Emma with other children stabs at her heart and she forces herself to blink the image away. Emma must sense her distress because she squeezes Regina's shoulder before addressing her, "Hey. Don't worry. I don't have any plans." Emma drops her voice and adds, "Besides it wouldn't be the same." 

Henry examines Emma closely, "You would have had kids with Mom?" 

Emma removes her hand from Regina's shoulder and scratches at the back of her own neck. "Um. Yeah. Well maybe. I mean I've thought about it. It's not like it matters now," Emma states bitterly. 

"I'm sorry," she says and she both does and doesn't mean it. Her mistakes have led to this point but without those mistakes there would have been no Emma and no Henry in the first place and it's difficult to be truly sorry for the events that led to having them in her life. 

"It's not your fault." 

"It feels like it is and it really feels like I'm being punished." 

Emma strokes Regina's hair and says, "I know what you mean." 

Henry's head swings back and forward like a pendulum watching their every move. "Maybe none of this needs to happen." 

"I know it's hard Henry but there really is no other way," she keeps her voice as calm as she is able to under the circumstances. "The curse can't be stopped but you and Emma can be spared." 

"Maybe it can be stopped," Henry says, his eyes full of so much hope that it's heartbreaking, "true love’s kiss can break any spell," he finishes pointedly. 

“Henry,” she says with a shaky voice, “that’s not something that has ever worked for me.” 

“But you _have_ to try!,” he implores. 

For Henry she would do anything but if this fails, when this fails, he will have no choice but to question what she feels for Emma and that is not the impression she wanted him to have about their relationship. She is so overwhelmed by the thought of disappointing him that she is paralysed. It takes Emma standing up and pulling her to her feet to spur Regina into action. 

She tucks a strand of Emma’s hair behind her ear and then leans in to kiss her. “Woah, woah, wait,” Henry says whilst waving his arms frantically. 

“What wrong kid?” Emma asks. “I thought this is what you wanted us to do.” 

“I do,” Henry agrees, “but that doesn’t mean it’s not kinda gross. If you make me watch I’m going to need to see Doctor Hopper for the rest of my life.” 

“Fine,” Emma says in an exaggerated manner, “turn around if that’s what you want.” Henry complies and that leaves Emma staring at her in a way that suggests that the blonde believes this might just work. 

She’s going to disappoint both of them and neither of them deserve this – if Pan wasn’t already dead she’d kill him for what he has done. “Emma,” she breathes but she doesn’t really know what else to say. 

“It’s okay,” Emma tells her. “I know you don’t think this will work.” 

“It’s not that I don’t want it too and it doesn’t meant that I don’t love you.” She loves Emma just as she once loved Daniel but when it comes to magic, her love has never been enough. 

“I know that too. It doesn’t matter if this doesn’t work.” 

“Really?” she asks incredulously because Emma can’t possibly mean that. 

“Well not really. I want it to work but if it doesn’t it won’t be anyone’s fault and at least it means I get to kiss you one last time.” 

She places her forehead against Emma’s and whispers, “I love you so, so much.” 

“Then kiss me,” Emma orders and so Regina does. She tries to put all that she has and all that she wants into the kiss. More importantly she tries to put all that she feels for Emma into the kiss. The kiss is a beginning and an ending. It is hope and it is fear. It is all that they have shared in the past and all that they want to share in the future. The kiss is everything but it is still not enough. 

No magic is issued and no curse is broken. This is it, this is all they are ever going to have. She can’t look at Emma after it’s done so she buries her head in crook of Emma’s neck and lets Emma hold her as her world comes to an end. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry." 

"It’s not your fault." 

"The kiss didn't work and we both know that's not on you." 

"Hey," Emma's voice is soft, like a caress, "you and I caused an eclipse and that was unimpressive compared with that kiss." She knows that Emma is just trying to plicate her but, like the kiss itself, Emma's words are nothing and everything. She moves her head so that it rests on Emma's shoulder and Emma's hand comes up to cup the back of her head. They stay like that, silent and unmoving, until she hears Henry clear his throat. 

“So I guess it didn’t work then.” 

She doesn’t trust herself to answer and so she is grateful when Emma takes the reigns. “No it didn’t. Can you give us a second here? There are a few things I need to say to your mom before she says goodbye to you.” 

Regina rallies herself because she has no choice. She needs to be strong for Henry. Her son moves away but it’s clear that his eyes and ears remain focused on their every move. 

“I don’t think we are going to have a lot of privacy,” she says to Emma. 

“I guess that’s okay. I mean it’s not like the Neverland lust magic is still in play. That would be awkward right now. Henry would need a lot more than just therapy.” 

She smiles in spite of their predicament, “Thank heavens for small mercies.” 

“It is a blessing,” Emma smiles back at her, “but if you wanted you could make it so we have privacy.” 

“I won’t use magic on him,” Regina says emphatically. “I can’t do that to him. I’m not like….” she can’t even finish that thought. 

“I know you’re not like her,” Emma assures her. “You’re a good person for an evil serial killer.” 

“Thank you, dear.” 

“And you’re a really great mom.” 

“Not for much longer.” 

“You’ll always be his mother.” 

“Emma he’s not even going to remember me.” She wills the tears not to come because if they start they are never going to stop. 

“But you’ll remember him. You’ll remember all that you’ve done for him.” She knows Emma is trying to comfort her but the fact that she will remember Henry can only be something that causes her pain. 

“And I’ll remember you too.” That won’t be any less painful but she suspects it’s something that Emma needs to hear. 

“Well when you are doing that I want you to remember that I didn’t go to that lunch with Neal and that I’m a selfish, horrible person because I’m glad that Blue died and got me out of it.” 

“I’m just glad Blue died period. The world was better of without her. I am not at all impressed that she's been resurrected.” 

“Not a fan?” Emma asks with a half-smile. 

“Not a lot of reason to be but I guess I should be thankful to her for dying, even if it was all too brief, and interrupting your date.” 

“It wasn’t a date. It was never a date.” 

She almost laughs at Emma’s indignation but then the reality of the situation hits her, “We are never going to get our date.” 

“I know and it fucking sucks.” 

Regina should criticise Emma for using such language in front of Henry but she can’t even talk. She can feel her lip trembling and she can no longer stop the water from falling from her eyes. She is a pathetic mess but there doesn’t seem to be anything that she can do about it. Emma places a kiss to her forehead and then runs her hands up and down Regina’s back in a soothing manner. 

“Why did you keep this a secret?” Henry asks and she is honesty not sure when he came up alongside them. 

“What’s that, Henry?” Emma asks. 

“This,” he points at the two of them, “why did it have to be secret?” 

“We were trying to work out it we could make things work,” she tells him. 

“Things aren’t always so smooth for the saviour and the evil queen,” Emma adds and gives Regina a gentle shove. 

“We planned to tell you but I was scared.” 

“Scared of me?” Henry’s surprise is almost comical. 

“Scared of what it would mean for you if we couldn’t make this work and scared of what would happen when people found out.” 

Emma looks at Regina like she's insane and says, “Your mom was worried I’d leave her once people started pointing out what a bad idea this was.” 

“And would you have?” Henry is treating this like it is a puzzle that he needs to solve. 

“No.” 

“So why was Mom worried?” 

“Because your mother is crazy.” Emma’s response earns her a playful punch from Regina. 

“What if I was the one pointing out it was a bad idea? What if I’d asked you to stop seeing one another?” 

Regina is a little amused that Henry thinks this might be how he would have handled things. History suggests that he is more likely to run away than to ask them anything. A knot forms in her stomach as she realises that he probably would have run to Neal. “That would have made things a lot more complicated. I really don’t know what I would have done.” 

Henry seems pleased with her answer but not with the situation, “I really don’t know how I feel about all of this.” 

“That's okay, Henry,” Emma says. 

“I just needed to tell you. I couldn’t lose you without you knowing," Regina says. 

“It’s that important to you guys, huh?” 

“Yes," they reply in unison. 

“What about the others? They’ll be here soon. Are you going to tell them when they come?” 

Emma gives a small shrug of her shoulders and can’t seem to look at Regina let alone answer Henry. “I wasn’t planning on it,” Regina tells him. 

“Why not?” 

“It’s not something they need to know. Not when Emma is leaving.” 

“You don’t want them to know because they’ll still remember when the curse comes,” Henry is livid. 

“In a way,” Regina admits. 

“So you only told me because I’m going to forget?” 

“It did make it easier to think it was the right decision but it’s not the reason that I told you. I wanted you to know. Not telling you has not been about not wanting you to know it’s been because we didn’t know if this would last.” 

“But you don’t want the others to know,” it’s an accusation not a question. 

“Not now. Not like this. Not when Snow will just think that I told her in order to hurt her. I will not have anyone believing that this was about anything other than how I feel about Emma. I know it’s a lot to ask, and I know I can’t make you, but Henry I’d really appreciate it you don’t tell them about this.” 

“You want me to lie?” 

“I’m hoping you’ll help keep our secret.” 

“I really don’t get why you don’t want them to know.” 

“Especially when part of you must want to use this information to make my mother miserable,” Emma says playfully. 

“I do enjoy a miserable Snow," she admits, "but making her unhappy is not more important than this. It’s not more important than you.” 

“I love you too, Regina.” 

“I don’t get it,” Henry squints his eyes and furrows his brow. 

“Don’t get what?” Emma asks him. 

“You really love Mom.” 

“Of course I do.” 

“And she really loves you,” he says and Regina nods her affirmation, “so why didn’t the kiss work?” 

“I don’t know Henry,” her voice is scratchy, “I don’t think it’s something I’m allowed to have. I know I’ve done a lot of bad things but long before that I needed true love’s kiss more than anything and it didn’t work for me.” 

“You loved someone else?” 

“He died a long, long time ago and I know what you are going to say but just because I loved him doesn’t at all mean that I don’t love Emma.” 

“The book would say that that’s wrong. The book says you only get one real love.” 

“Life isn’t a book Henry, not even for those of us who come straight out of stories.” 

Henry nods solemnly, “I’m not sure that the book is right.” She can sees him losing his faith in fairy tales right before her eyes. 

“I know the book is important to you,” Regina says cautiously. 

“It’s just a book,” He replies and she wants to laugh and scream at the same time. That book changed everything. “I’m not sure it tells the whole story.” 

“It left out a thing of two about your mom,” Emma informs him. 

“Yeah. It never mentioned anything about who you were before you were the evil queen. I’m sorry that I never thought to ask.” 

She can feel the blood draining from her face. “Bad things happened to me Henry, a lot of bad things, and I thought that meant I was justified in what I was doing but I was wrong. I wish we had more time. I wish I could help you learn from my mistakes.” 

“So you regret the things that you did?” 

“Not for a second.” The disappointment that she was trying to avoid is etched all over Henry’s features as she reaches out to cup his chin. “I can’t regret the things that I did because they led me to you and they led me Emma.” She feels Emma wrap an arm across her shoulders and give her a small squeeze. There is so much she wants to tell Henry but she can hear a car approaching and she desperately tries to contain her anxiety. 

Henry stares at her and then sighs, “It’s okay Mom. Moms you don’t have to worry. I don't know how I feel about all of this but you can trust me with your secret. I’m not going to tell anyone about the two of you.” 

“Thank you.” She pulls him to her side and Emma completes the group hug. The world may be about to come crashing down but what she has right now is perfect and it’s almost worth the sacrifices she needs to make. She can’t keep the people that she loves but she can do everything in her power to make sure that Emma and Henry live happily ever after.


End file.
